The Night Before Ella

     Tonight is the last night for me as a mother of two. As I sit here I have many emotions much like when I was in labor with Cooper and Avery. This time it is however a little different. My heart hurts for her tonight. She is about to leave everything familiar to her and become enveloped with new faces, funny languages, new smells, and new surroundings. It is a little much for a 23 month old. I am sure she will be terrified upon meeting us. How do you possibly show someone how much you love them in a moment? Our love is free and unconditional and will never leave her but how can she possibly see that upon meeting us? She can't. It will take time to develop that trust and understanding. This part is hard and overwhelming but worth every moment to develop that bond.
     As I walked the streets of China today I thought about all the people around me who probably didn't know Christ as their Savior. It hurt my heart. Christ love is free and unconditional and all anyone has to do is except. But like it will be for Ella it is hard for some people to trust. That is where the I feel the body of Christ comes in. We have to build relationships with the lost so that the love for Christ in us will shine through us so that they can see. If they see love in us then we can point them to the one who freely gives.
     I am happy to know I have a Heavenly Father who loves me dearly. Even much more than I love all three of my children. It is so hard to imagine that it is possible but I know He does. My prayer tonight is that God will allow Ella to bond with us quickly and that the relationship we build with her will be strong and she will see Christ love in us and through us. Here is a devotional I found that I really feel sums up my heart tonight.

Because I love you

with an everlasting love.

Jeremiah 31:3 

The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying: 

I have loved you with an everlasting love; 

I have drawn you with loving-kindness.

(NIV Bible)

All that Father does is motivated by His everlasting love for us. A love that is perpetual, unending, and eternal. He has drawn us with a loving-kindness that will never run out or dry up. When describing what everlasting love means, I believe that Jack Winter says it best... "There was never a time in all of eternity when we were not loved by God."

Father's everlasting love has always been there and will always be there. There is nothing we can do to make God love us any more than He does right now and there is nothing that we can do to make God love us any less than He does right now. It is difficult for us to be able to comprehend this kind of unconditional love and acceptance.

That is why the Apostle Paul prayed in Ephesians 3:17-19 that we might be rooted and established in love, may have power together with all of the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. (NIV Bible)

We may know that God loves us in our heads, but He desires for this revelation to seep into every fabric of our being. Love is meant to be experienced, not only intellectually understood. If we never feel love from those around us, life becomes very empty. A big hug from someone we care about FEELS good. A kind word or a loving glance FEELS good. While our access to God is through faith, we must believe that there is a reward for those that diligently seek Him (Hebrews 11:6). Our ultimate reward is the revelation of our Father's everlasting love for us.

PRAYER

Father, I thank You for loving me with a love that will never run out or dry up. May Your loving-kindness seep into every area of my being...spirit, soul and body. I want to experience Your love in a deeper way than I have ever experienced before. I pray that my heart may be rooted and established in Your love, and that I might have power to grasp how wide and how long and how high and how deep is your love for me expressed in the person of Your Son, Jesus Christ. In the name of Your beloved Son, Jesus I pray, AMEN.